Cinquecento Round 4: King of the Hill: Dwarfs Win 648 to 190 Against the Greenskins
Since Wilini couldn’t make it today, we went ahead and played next week’s round early. He’ll make up for it by playing two rounds next week.
We had one of those games where the score tells one story, and the table tells an even better one. This time it was a 648 to 190 win for the dwarfs, which translated into a solid 5:1 result for the stunties.
And yes, the mood after the game could be summed up in exactly two words:
KING OF THE HILL
A very dwarfy plan… in theory
On paper, the dwarfs were clearly geared for a proper scrap. Big axes, angry faces, and every intention of burying those blades deep into green skins. In practice, though, they spent most of the battle running from one objective to another instead of getting stuck into melee.
Not because the greenskins were too tough.
Because there was barely anything left to chop by the time the rest of the army got there.
The real workhorses: gyrocopters and rangers
As end3r put it, the real heavy lifting was done first by two gyrocopters, and then by the unceasing fire of the brave Rangers shooting from a hill. Backing them up was an Engineer who apparently decided that ordinary firearms were for lesser beings.
He brought what can only be described as the most over-the-top pistol in history, crammed full of magical runes. It didn’t just increase the number of shots — every projectile was basically turning into a huge fireball, tearing through enemy units and thinning out the much larger greenskin force at a terrifying pace.
By the sound of it, the Engineer nearly defeated the whole hated greenskin army almost single-handedly, and did it without taking a single wound.
Honestly, that is exactly the kind of absurd dwarfen efficiency we love seeing on the table.
King of the Hill means King of the Hill
The cry of KING OF THE HILL came up immediately after the report, and it really does sound like the perfect summary. The dwarfs locked into the mission, moved where they had to move, took the important ground, and then let the shooting do the talking.
That’s maybe the funniest part of the whole battle report: a force that looked ready for a brutal close-quarters grind instead ended up winning through movement between objectives and absolutely savage ranged support.
One small post-battle conclusion
There was also a quick verdict on the character setup: if we actually wanted someone for a proper brawl, then the current choice sounds a bit underwhelming in melee. A Thane might simply be a better solo fighter for that role.
Which, to be fair, feels very on-brand after a game where the supposed combat pieces mostly watched the Engineer and the shooting elements delete the enemy from a distance.
Final thoughts
A 5:1 win, a 648 to 190 scoreline, two gyrocopters doing early damage, Rangers dominating from the hill, and an Engineer with a completely ridiculous rune-loaded pistol setting half the battlefield on fire — that’s a battle we’re not forgetting quickly.
Sometimes the axes don’t get the glory.
Sometimes the hill, the guns, and one wildly overperforming Engineer take it all.
